There are moments when everything seems to be falling apart my love. My days are a mess, I can see no future ahead, and bad things keep happening. Sometimes all I want is to close my eyes and remember you Lea. Only that stops, somehow, the pain. How I wish all this could be just a phase, some sort of final test before being able to hold you forever. I don’t seem to be able to write or think clearly anymore. I have lots of ideas about things I have to do, but those ideas are colliding with each other inside my mind, and it seems I’m nothing but a helpless spectator. How I miss you Lea... If only you were with me I would be so much stronger! You took away my fear. I love you so much!