When I lost you Lea, after the initial shock, I told myself I would want to try and do something of my life, to make it worth living, and by doing so honoring your life too. I made it my wish, and my intent, to make you proud of me, of having loving me one day. But I guess that’s something I will not be able to do. I will never do nothing special, neither for myself nor to make you proud of me. I try but just can’t find a job, I have no money, am full of debts, and am feeling each day more detached from this world and from everybody. I feel scared sometimes, and others I just wish I had someone with me, to talk a little, to do me company, I’m not sure. I dream so much my love! I keep dreaming and dreaming, as if that’s the only thing left for me now. I have never felt so lonely in my life. I still want to try, but don’t know what to do anymore, feel scared sometimes, but mostly I feel so alone. Where’s my life? Well, at least you know what I feel for you. Only you know how I feel, how I miss you.